Questionable Rants and Raves

The Ultimate Shit Show....

Tonight I 'm going to a "BeerPong" tournament with TURBO and Chucktown.  BeerPong is game which requires tremendous amounts of skill and stamina.  I usually end up getting so drunk that I lie on my couch, eating Chinese food for 2 days trying to recover from a hard evening of gaming and drinking.  Book Stud is right I am a FRAT BOY.  I wonder if I will ever outgrow drinking games?  I really don't see it happening.  If there is a game and canned beer count me in.  I like how the party in the picture has "the champagne of beers" as their beer of choice.  That is classy.  Speaking of class I wonder how the case of bud cans I currently have chillin' in the office fridge are doing?  If you can't find me by Monday call the WARDEN and tell her I won't be home for 4th of July.

*Judge no worries I will be home for the wedding-hangover and all.  Maybe we can play at the reception.

Gingerkid = Badass

Meet BingBings he stands next to me at work.  I like to tease him about being a "gingerkid" and being soft.  Yesterday he presented me with this little gem and said  " I may be a gingerkid, but here is a picture of me lookin' hard down in the dirty, dirty of New Orleans!"  I have to agree with him the biker flavor-saver/ side burn thing does make him look kinda hard.  It was all ruined when LD looked at him and goes "You look like you're about to cry.  What's the matter?  You didn't make  the final cut for the new version of the Village People?" 
BingBings left in snit after that comment.  I knew he was soft all along.  Only at the NYMEX people...Only at the NYMEX.

The Purse

I find the purse to be an overrated accessory.   It is cumbersome, it doesn't always match your current outfit,it is easy to misplace in a drunken stupor, and strangers are constantly going through it.  The boys are a little perplexed as to why I don't carry a purse.  I almost spit water all over Chrissy when he told me how shocked he was that I had never owned a purse let alone carried one.  Those of you who know me are probably spitting some type of beverage all over your keyboard at the thought of me with a purse.  Below are the questions that Chrissy asked me when trying to understand my lack of love for the purse. 

• What about to a wedding?NO
• How did you carry your "Barbies"?  I never owned one-GI JOE Yes
• What about your "lady things"? I have pockets
• What if you don't have any pockets? I don't buy things without pockets.
• You've never carried a purse ever? No never

After that the questions stopped.  He still looks at me with utter confusion every time he sees me with my "bag".  I know one day he is going to try to compare it to a purse.  When he does I intend to "choke him out".

Let me make this quite clear.  If I haven't worn a dress since 1991.  I have no intention of ever owning a purse.

MR. MET & The Boy Who Loves Him

I  have never seen  Chrissy this happy.   Who knew after all of these years that all it took was  Mr. Met .  I especially like the  "hug "  one. These were taken at  his buddies  rehearsal  dinner.  I wonder  if  I could  get  "Bucky  The  Badger"  from  Wisconsin to come to my next party? *  Meg  he wouldn't  give  me the one of the  two  of you and Mr. Met.  I think  he keeps that one  in close to his heart.

Geography With Lamb Chop

As many of you know I work on the NYMEX floor or as I like to call it the "Cesspool of Stupidity".  For the last four years we've been really busy watching the price of oil go up as we invade countries and threaten to do so to others.  I have spent my entire career working in commodities and nothing makes these markets move better than disaster.  When I worked in the grains it was flood, drought, beetle infestation and in the energies it is all about war, OPEC, and hurricanes.  I love disaster because it makes the markets move.  I know that is sick, but hey I hate standing around.  Well we stand around a lot these days- I feel like I could be replaced by a golf cart at any second
  Back to the story.
I work with 3 boys- Lamb Chop, Chrissy, and Turbo.  At least one time during the day I double over in uncontrollable laughter with these three.  The gem that came out of Lamb Chop's mouth today was unreal.  We are standing around talking to Turbo about his vacation and out of the clear blue sky Lamb Chop chimes in with.
"Ya know, looking at a globe is a fuckin' eye opening experience.....Canada is frickin' huge....Greenland is as big as this country."
It was like someone just opened up little portal into his mind and how it works.  It was a strange stream of consciousness.  I just doubled over and laughed and then the other two clowns joined me.  Once Lamb Chop realized we were laughing at him he simply looked at all three of and said " What?  I'm talking about earth shattering shit here.  I'm going to lunch. Fuck all of you."
That folks is just another day in "The Cesspool of Stupidity".
*can't say things like that in an office-they put a note in your file for being unproductive*